This is fun – an article from the New York Times about “crash blossoms.” Those are headlines that don’t make sense because they’ve dropped too many of the little words that help make English understandable. Most of them hinge on the fact that a lot of English words can be both nouns and verbs, and the third person singular of the verb is the same as the plural of the noun. Thus: “British Left Waffles on Falklands.” Heh-heh. Waffles.
Helen
i am the dan bloom in the Times story who coined crash blosssoms. i was joking and the storyjust grew. i lived in alaska for 12 years. wonder if yiou can ffreelacne wrirte about my polar cities idea for a US mag or newspaper? caontcat me at danbloom AT gmail DOT com and this is my latest coiagne
I wrote THE SNAILPAPER STATEMENT today, and here’s a preview:
“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that while the Digital Age is upon us fast and furious, the print newspaper — hereafter dubbed the “snailpaper” — shall persevere as a good daily read, a fascinating look at the world around us and a valuable tool for understanding oped pundits and above the fold headlines. Sure, the dear snailpaper will also be seen as a useful tool
for wrapping fish at the Fulton Fish Market or lining the bird cage in the den, but all kidding aside — har! har! — the daily snailpaper can hold its head high and be certain of its place in the culture. While news migrates in pixels and bytes to the Internet at an exponential rate, piling breaking story upon breaking story and turning everyone and his mother into a 24/7 news freak and RSS aggregator, the plodding snailpaper will nevertheless remain the bedrock of analysis and insight, from sea to shining sea, delivered at a snail’s pace, yes, read at a snail’s pace, yes, and absorbed, word for word — on glorius printed paper! white newsprint reflecting inked letters! — at a snail’s pace, yes, as long as the Republic of Letters shall live.”
Full blast here:
http://zippy1300.blogspot.com/2010/02/snailpaper-statement-mini-version-by.html
Funny, at the end of the article, the writer says we can count on “crash blossoms continuing to blossom.” I was struck by that because I would have said we can count on them to continue to crash. Thoughts?
or to bloom? but yes good pint LF, crash blossoms do crash, with a thud, yes, good point, may i quote you on this for a future blog post of mine re
I see by the snailpapers in Britain that a major literary agent has signed up a top journo there to write an “on language” type of book about CRASH BLOSSOMS in the English-language media the world over, for publication in 2012 — and advance of US$25,000 is being reported, the writer keeping low profile, book capitalizing on Ben Zimmer’s recent New York Times “On Language” article about said “crash blossoms” and how they, er, bloomed, er, blossomed ….. THE BOOK SHOULD BE A WINNER! BRAVO!
No, the book won’t be Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim, and Other Flubs from the Nation’s Press published by Columbia Journal in 1980, before the term “crash blossoms” bloomed, and no, it won’t be titled Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge a 1987 tome by Gloria Cooper. The title of the Crash Blossoms book is still tentative but for sure CRASH BLOSSOMS will appear in the title. Any suggestions for what to call this book? I will forward them on to the literary agent, the editor and the author.
The book also will not be titled Anguished English: An Anthology of Accidental Assaults Upon Our Language which Richard Lederer did in 1987.
Sounds interesting, Dan! Thanks for stopping by the blog!